Resolutions, this time it will be different! Right?

So this is the time of year when we all make promises to improve ourselves and vow that it will be different this year because your resolve is totally better than it was last year. And then we look back a year later and realize that you forgot most of those resolutions by January and it wasn't different at all. Last year I made a very comprehensive list on my iPod so I'd be able to look at it frequently and remind myself of what I should be doing better. Of course, two months later I forgot that feature existed and in quickly faded into obscurity.
BUT NOW IT WILL BE DIFFERENT FOR REAL BECAUSE FACEBOOK. Hold me to this internet. That is all.

- Be kinder to animals.

- Stop dealing with dumb bitches.

- Get my knitting on. Hardcore. I'm talking ugly-ass sweaters here.

- Actually do homework. And study. Not bullshit "I CAN WATCH HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER AND DO PHILOSOPHY AT THE SAME TIME" homework.

- Find a way to watch EVEN MORE TV

- Get a job so I can say "GET A JOB HIPPY" to people who don't have jobs.

- Violin. I should play it more often. Make sweet love with that instrument

- At least get a gym membership and attend every week for that rock hard body. For the ladies.

- Acquire more suits. MAYBE SCUBA SUIT!?

- GRADUATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL.

- Learn how to english better.

- Become the greatest free-style curser to ever walk this earth

- Read every book I own.

- Learn Sanskrit. Bitches love the Sanskrit.

- Continue to be as rad and geeky as possible. CAN YOU SAY ROLLER BLADES? I SURE CAN.

I think that's enough for now. I mean, I can't be TOO perfect, can I?